Boom Goes the Dynamite picked up its second win of the season with a 17-2 spanking of Lucky Strikes last night, but the celebration was short-lived for right fielder Kevin Noth (Madison, Wis.) as the hair-challenged team strikeout leader announced his intention to file a lawsuit of craigslist after an incident involving his $5 cleats (photo below) bought on the online community. Noth, 0-for-3 on the night, tripped and fell while running to first base in the second inning, but reached base on a throwing error by the Lucky Strikes shortstop.
"Let's face it. I got ripped off," Noth said from a press conference at Fat Lorenzo's Pizza. "I spent good money on cleats that I expected to take me to the next level in my softball career. That craigslist guy promised me big things that did not include me sprawled out face-first on the first-base line. The law offices of Curtis K. Walker have been contacted. Craiglist, consider yourself sued."
The spring season has not been kind to Wisconsin native and Big Ten Fantasy Football League runner-up Noth. In last week's 13-5 loss to longtime rival Yellow Snow, Noth struck out and went 1-for-4 in front of wife Lori and infant son Cameron. Against Lucky Strikes, Noth whiffed again and failed to get the ball out of the infield for the second consecutive week. For his "efforts," Noth was named the Nick Joos/M. Lochrem Goat of the Week.
"It's flat-out embarrassing," slugger and outfield bully Tory Kukowski (Lewiston, Minn.) said. "I thought after his game-winning walkoff hit in last year's championship game we'd see a whole new Kevin Noth. Boy, was I wrong. All I see is a guy in $5 cleats lying in the dirt. That's just not Boom Goes the Dynamite softball."
Noth's hijinks notwithstanding, Boom broke out of its slump with the entire lineup (sans Noth) showing the offensive prowess that paced the franchise to a league-record 23-game win streak from August 2005 to April 2007. Kukowski went 4-for-4 with a home run, Week 1 Goat Jeff Keiser (Avon, Ct.) finally got his bat going with a round-tripper and four hits, third baseman Andrea Smith (Golden Valley, Minn.) made her debut with a strong all-around showing and wily veteran Kyle Coughlin (Eden Prairie, Minn.) continued being great with his first injury-free three-week span since the seventh grade.
Keiser, acting team president and general manager, made several moves in the batting order and the defensive lineup to provide a much-needed spark to the club. Keiser moved his previously weak bat lower in the lineup and promoted the surprisingly well-hitting and popup-free Kukowski to the No. 3 spot. The move worked as both outfielders led the team in slugging percentage and runs scored.
Two-time Boom Player of the Week Meghan Potter (Hibbing, Minn.) continued her torrid start to the season, reminding some of her six home run, 34 RBI sophomore season at North Dakota State. In addition, second baseman Katie Fornasiere (Maple Grove, Minn.), daughter of Golden Gopher assistant baseball coach, gave Boom some speed on the basepaths that was absent in recent weeks with the attitude of Lisa "I run when I want to run" Hardy (Hopkins, Minn.).
In injury news, pitcher Steve Geller (Port Jefferson, N.Y.) suffered a mild separated shoulder on a baserunning blunder in the third inning. He is listed as day-to-day. Crissy Potter (Hibbing Minn.), last week's second baseman, missed last night's game with a concussion and general body pain after shortstop Kevin Kurtt's body-check at second base in the game vs. Yellow Snow.
The rout of Lucky Strikes sets up a key early-season match-up with league leader ERAC (3-0), a team comprised of steel workers, longshoremen, Venezuelan infielders and single mothers. Two-time defending CSC Champion Boom Goes the Dynamite faces ERAC at 8:20 p.m., on Monday, May 7, at Lake Nokomis Diamond #4.
Notes:
• Boom has out-scored its opponents 41-21 through three games this season.
• Kyle Coughlin made his first career appearance at first base.
• CSC continued its utter disregard for unsafe playing conditions as play was never suspended despite the prevalence of lightning in the area.
• Katie Fornasiere reportedly made it home in time to watch Heroes.
• Casey Kurtt's belly continued to expand, apparently providing the catcher with additional power.
• Tory Kukowski's girlfriend failed to make an appearance at the third consecutive Boom game, leading some to question her actual existence.
• Jeff Keiser displayed exceptional intestinal fortitude, playing just hours after a rigorous physical therapy session to heal a real or imagined lower leg injury.
• Fans in attendance: Laura Kurtt (3 appearances), Emily Wickstrom (1 app.) - Wickstrom now eligible for the Jeannie/Cowboy Bob Superfan Award.
• Fan standings: Laura Kurtt (3 appearances), Michelle Train (2 apps.), Shane Sandersfeld (2 apps.), Lori Noth (1 app.), Cameron Noth (1 app.), Lisa Carlson (1 app.), Pam Hardy (1 app.), Emily Wickstrom (1 app.), Jim and Beth Kurtt (0 combined appearances).
• Mascots in attendance: Cooper (3 appearances)
• Mascot standings: Cooper (3 appearances), Koda (1 app.), Maggie (0 app.)
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