Boom Goes the Dynamite, a second-year slow-pitch softball franchise with links to the now-defunct teams of Gas on the Fire and I’m With Stupid, has announced that its 2006 Cities Sports Connection will be dedicated to the now-defunct and former left fielder “Sugar” Shane Sandersfeld. Boom Goes the Dynamite team president and manager Steve “Yuri” Geller, fresh off an appearance with the Israeli National Team at the World Baseball Classic, made the announcement during an online broadcast of Golden Gopher Baseball on gophersports.com.
“I would like to proclaim that the 2006 campaign will hereby be known as ‘The Sandersfeld Season’ or ‘The Season We Don’t Have to Witness Two Foul-Outs in the Same Game by Our Supposed Best Power Hitter,’” Geller said. “The first motto is catchy, but the second one is a little more accurate. We’re proud to dedicate this season to Shane even if his dedication to Boom Goes the Dynamite was as fickle as a dandelion puff in the wind.”
A native of Williamsburg, Iowa, Sandersfeld injured his neck in a freak bodysurfing accident in Cancun, Mexico earlier this year, placing him on the All-Time Worst Athletic Communications Sporting Moments Hall of Fame, just behind last season’s inductee: Iggy the Parakeet Attack after a Boom Goes the Dynamite Softball Game.
“Shan is broken. He no play soffetball,” Bierman Field Athletic Building janitor and Boom Goes the Dynamite team physician Mahadi Abbou Sammad said from the Bierman unisex bathroom. “Shan neck no good. I see him hurt bad and say ‘You no hit ball no more.’ He understand.”
As part of the season dedication to Sandersfeld, team members will don patches bearing the smiling mug of the lanky left fielder. Boom Goes the Dynamite will also donate all of its earnings to The Fund to Keep Athletic Communication Staff Members Out of Bodies of Water (TFKACSMOBW).
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